LEARNIG OBJECTIVES: 1. Be able to explain the difference between a psychologist, psychotherapist, psychiatrist and psychoanalyst. 2. Understand why you need a psychologist even if you are well.
Dealing with negative psychological patterns.
Hello, guys!
My name is Andrei Shcheglov, and today we are going to talk about psychology. My friend Ilya Kornienko, a psychologist, has prepared material on this topic for you. As a foreword, I will give a short opening section.
Nowadays, society has formed a very strange attitude towards psychology, psychologists, and, furthermore, towards people who use the services of psychologists. A high percentage of people will not explain the difference between a psychologist, psychotherapist, psychiatrist and psychoanalyst.
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As my friend Kostya Shukalov wrote - "This gives many people the impression that if you consult a psychologist, you are schizoid, a fool and almost walk around the house in a straitjacket. 😆" And that's actually completely wrong. In today's world, it seems reasonable and logical - if a person has deep expertise in his profession (developer, designer, cook, astronaut, DJ, etc.). If a person knows and understands how his body works, both in aspects of sports and nutrition. It has become quite a common skill for us to know how to use a computer and use a cell phone; we know both how to use and what to click in a few dozen mobile applications and messengers. Many people can drive a car. Many of them also know how a car functions and are not confused by words like brake pads and discs, "change the oil in the engine", accumulator, fuel and air filter, suspension, etc.
At the same time, many people are not even aware of how their minds and brains work. Many do not distinguish the brain from the mind. We do want to become some kind of a person, to understand our profession, but we completely forget about who we are. But how do we understand who we are? To understand how we think, how we make decisions, why we get offended or angry, why we have mood swings, what kind of relationships we have with other people, parents, how our past experiences (negative and positive) affect our lives, how to work with emotions, what is "choice room" or free will space, what is the difference between reaction and response and many other questions... We understand hundreds of different things, yet we are still far from being happy or feeling like we are fully alive or living our own lives - precisely because we haven't understood who we are.
Article by Ilya Kornienko.
Myths and legends about psychology and psychologists.
Hello guys, my name is Ilya Kornienko! During 8 years of my private practice as a psychologist and psychotherapist and about 10 years of studies, I have faced a lot of myths about the profession I belong to. Today I have tried to highlight the most obvious and widespread myths and refute them briefly. I identify only two main categories and have invented names for them: myths that devalue and myths that charm. So here we go!)
Devaluing myths:
😡 What can he possibly tell me about myself? I know everything about myself far better than any psychologist.
😊 Yes, indeed, you always know more about yourself than any other person, including a psychologist. But a psychologist knows (can find out, notice in the process of working with you) something about you that you do not know about yourself. This is a feature of a psychologist's work. He allows you to see what is hidden in your consciousness about yourself. This is the certain shadow (unconscious) manifestations of your personality, which is difficult to see on your own.
😡 To sit in front of someone and listen, nodding and at the end ask a couple of stupid questions, and get a lot of money for it - such a job, I would do it by myself! I'm going into psychology - I'm going to make lots of money!
😊 You can simply carry on an experiment, e.g. with a loved one (since psychotherapeutic relationships are quite close). When your loved one wants to tell you something important for him/her, in 1 hour, try to keep silent for 50 minutes. And to complete the picture, listen carefully and really be aware of what he's saying. Try to look at this world through the eyes of your loved one for those 50 minutes. For the remaining 10 minutes, give genuine support. No more than that. Your phone should be on silent mode. And if your house burns down, for example, you will not know about it during this 1 hour. If you manage to complete this experiment, then yes, being a psychologist is no big deal.
😡 Going to a psychologist is for the girls, and a real man just won't waste time on it!
😊 In fact - meeting with a psychologist, which is essentially meeting with yourself - is quite a brave and courageous journey. And courage and bravery, after all, are masculine (male) qualities in a socially acceptable sense.
😡 The goal of the psychologist is to hook you in permanently. That you constantly use his services and pay him. Because he is a manipulator, he knows different tricks and techniques. Psychologist builds a relationship with you - just for the money.
😊 A psychologist is first and foremost a human being. And some people may indeed have these qualities and personality traits. From my own statistics: in 12 years in psychology, knowing thousands of colleagues all over the world - I have never met, not one such greedy, manipulative psychologist.
😡 I am a psychologist myself, an everyday psychologist! I know how life works. If a woman says no, it really means yes. If a man drives a big expensive jeep, it means he has an inferiority complex.
😊 The difference between a psychologist is that in his work he uses hypotheses (assumptions), not "life truths". For the psychologist, the jeep itself is initially neutral. For the Jeep to become a marker (symptom) of an inferiority complex, the psychologist has to formulate and prove the appropriate hypothesis.
Charming myths:
🤩 A psychologist can see right through you!
You're a psychologist, tell me, what kind of person am I? What can you really know about me? You are taught how to read people, right?
🤔 A psychologist is not a clairvoyant. However, psychologists can actually see all kinds of verbal and nonverbal cues, which help them gather information about a person's personality pattern, aptitudes and abilities.
But all of this is relevant to a client's direct psychological work, in the office. Not a meeting of reunions, where a former classmate, under the influence of alcohol, is trying to learn something about themselves. At this meeting, the psychologist acts as just a normal guy, a classmate. And believe me, he (the psychologist) in such situations, in general, is not up to analysis, diagnosis, and close observation. In fact, he's here to relax.
🤩 A psychologist will solve my problems!
🤔 Without your direct engagement and taking responsibility for your life - your problems will not be solved. That's the way it happens only in hypnosis movies. In therapy, you have actually to work with a psychologist.
🤩 Being a psychologist is a gift. A psychologist is a gift you have to be born with. Not everyone can become a psychologist.
🤔 Actually, and this is a myth, to my opinion. Everyone is given abilities that can be developed. Almost everyone can develop empathy, congruence (matching internal and external manifestations), active listening, observation and so on.
🤩 A psychologist always keeps his feelings and emotions under control. Anger, aggression, worry and anxiety are not about him!
🤔 A psychologist really has the ability to psychically self-regulate. But let's remember again that a psychologist is first of all a human being. And as we know, the whole range of feelings and emotions is available to a human being for experiencing and feeling and reacting.
There are situations in which showing anger and aggression, for example, is a sign of good temper and emotional maturity.